This is the 2nd time I am writing this. My 1st one deleted on me and so this one I am sure will not be as great. Ughhhhh

Anyways wherever I left off I am happy C: However things are going now, I’m happy they’re going.

Right now it’s spring break. I had an extremely eventful 1st day/night of Spring Break. During the day I donated blood for the 1st time. I had to get both my middle fingers pricked because my blood wasn’t coming out. Turns out those who eat raisins and veggies and fruits have more iron in their bloodstream which causes their blood to clot better. At least now I know that in a life or death situation I’d be better off. As everyone sat upright during their blood donating I was laid down. The lady said it was because I was 16 and small. I asked her what planet she was on that she thought I was small. She was like your arms/wrists and body is small! I couldn’t believe her. It kinda made my day. She said I was small for the donating world. Supposedly the procedure was only supposed to take 5-20mins but it took me around 45mins-1hr. I kept pumping but my blood would come out slowly. I believe I donated a pint of blood. I was also rushing because I actually wanted to take my physics test but I ended up missing it :( No worries I took it later on that day. Apparently after donating blood you can’t workout for 48hrs so no track practice for me and it was cancelled anyways. I ended up going to the mall with Emily and Evelyn and then grabbing some unbaked St. Patty’s day Pillsbury cookies and making them and completely eating them all ((they were veddy delicious)) :3. After this Evelyn and I decided we needed to go for a walk. We walked from Mike’s Place in Annadale to the Conference House all the way in Tottenville which is about 5.2mi from 6:30-8:30 which is about 2hrs! We had to pee really badly on the way so we were forced to go in a gas station and let’s just say never forget to bring tissues with you. Ever. It was purely disgusting! Once we got to the Conference House we had to pee again and we went to Egger’s and bought some candy and used their actually clean bathroom. It was beautiful. Anyways later on we met up with Josh and his cousin, Brandon. Evelyn and I both thought that Josh’s cousin was hot. Not saying that I don’t think Josh is hot, oh he is but still. I’ve heard quite a few stories about him and never got to meet him and actually got a chance to meet him today. So we ended up walking to the train that way Evelyn and I could make it back to her car. Evelyn’s bro Oscar picked us up from the station and on our way to the car he raced this hot guy in the car next to us. Of course the hot guy won but still it was really quite amusing.

Then we go back and pick up Josh and Brandon. We brought them back to Evelyn’s. There we did quite a bit of drinking. We had Coconut Ciroc vodka followed by rum and then finishing it with some classy merlot. Lol. Josh got really drunk. He wanted to. He got really happy and turned into
someone completely not himself, I just didn’t like it. He aggravated me. Throughout the whole night I wouldn’t really believe that he was “drunk.” I felt like he was putting on this whole show. By the end of the night he hit me in the face 4x and proposed to me twice. He would make out with mid-air and when he would kiss me it would be so sloppy that I didn’t want to kiss him at
all. Some of the things he would say I just didn’t want to listen to. He would just say the most ridiculous things. I mean sure some of it was amusing but I really didn’t enjoy it. Oscar and Brandon were better off and were able to take care of themselves. I mean he was really happy so I’m glad but still. I think he’s way funnier and such a better person when he’s sober. My favorite moment of the night had to be singing in the backseat with Brandon when Evelyn was driving the two of them home. Josh was sleeping and it was the one time when I wasn’t worrying about him as much and just enjoying myself. I didn’t have to worry about any of his drunk actions either.

The next morning I got around 6 messages from Josh saying he was sorry about the night before. I told him it’s fine I mean I figured it was just a one night thing. I don’t think I ever want to experience him drunk ever again though. It’s just not fun, well for me it’s not. On Friday I went bowling with the trackies and then to the mall and then back to chichi’s and watched the original American Pie while eating dominos tehe. Evelyn came over and then we left together. We ended up picking up Josh and Brandon from the movies after they saw American Reunion. We didn’t know where to go or what to do :/ We could’ve gone back to Evelyn’s but we didn’t really want a repeat of the night before and also Evelyn had plans but they were pushed back later. We ended up driving aimlessly to the Conference House and chilling there for a bit.

Okay my personal opinion: I dislike PDA. If I’m with a group of people I don’t like anyone feeling left out or making anyone feel awkward or anything like that. If it’s super quiet in a car I don’t think that’s the best time to kiss someone. Not saying I don’t want to I just think that there’s a
better time for that. Like when you’re one-on-one with that person or in private or surrounded by people who you aren’t socializing with. But Josh didn’t like that. Later on that night he texted me saying thanks for wanting my cousin or something like that. Ok I thought his cousin was cute but no. I wouldn’t go for his cousin. That’s ridiculous! I sat in the backseat to be with him. I had Evelyn drive me/us around the past 2 days for him. I wanted to see/be with him before he went to Florida. The thing is that when we were in her car talking some of the stuff I already knew Josh’s experiences/opinions on and I wanted to hear Evelyn’s and Brandon’s. After that ittybitty scuffle things did get better though. By the end of the night I called Josh babe C: I just felt like it was right.

Anyways things are great. I’m soso happy we are back in each other’s lives. We even told each other we loved each other. Sometimes I actually get bored during our conversations though. I get tired of the repetitive hearts and kissy faces and miss yous. Don’t get me wrong I like them
but I just feel like I’m always seeing them! Sometimes I really wish that he’d just ask me questions. I feel like I’m the only one actually trying to talk about something different. I feel like I actually want to get to know him and not talk about the same thing all the time. Sometimes I feel like not talking to him for an entire day so we’d actually have something to talk about the next day, how bad is that!? Sometimes I don’t tell him things in hopes that maybe he’ll ask me about them but he never seems to ask or anything. Like I previously give a general answer in hopes that he’ll ask me about anything. It could be any question from something as small as “what are you doing tomorrow?” to just a random question or something, I don’t know I’d just really like that. I
especially hate the one word answers or when he says “hmm” I never feel like answering those but of course I do anyways. It’s weird that I actually want the conversation going even though sometimes I feel like I’m engaging in it the most.

But I’m happy with the way things are. I really am. <3